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Sunday, March 28, 2010

Epiphany

I got a feeling early this morning
How early .. I think it would about 1 .55
What feeling ?
The strangest and craziest dream
I dreamed that there was this great teacher having his lessons
And I wanted to Him
He turned around from His blackboard
And stared at me
Do you want me like me ?
Point to his nose
Read !! Know the world
Know History, Society, Art and Culture
Know War and any knowledge you can find
Student do not want to read text books
They want to read YOU
So wake up
Pick up a book and read
I asked :
What about the other part of life ?
He said
live yours HIS way
Many interesting stories you will live experiences you will learnt !

I woke up feeling something has struck a deep cord in my heart
I am up to the challenge and I will take it !

my little blue Umbrella

i was swept with the great wind
nearly blown off my feet
i was vulnerable

i was wash by the down pour
together with wind
came rushin' to me

the thunder
as if screaming threats
to my little ears

i standing there
with my little blue umbrella
marveled at such a great sight

You are my umbrella
inspite the storms
and winds
You keep me dry
You shade me from the rain
and cover my eyes at the thunders might

though the waters touch my toes and legs
You have kept
most of me dry
You are refuge
by my side
my little blue Umbrella

Saturday, March 27, 2010

Running world

We have all changed
From the innocent us
To the who we are right now
We might even change more
who knows ?
The world is ever changing
But the things we hold on to must stay
I mean
Our values, principles and belief
After all
If even we lost those
Can we consider that us anymore ?

Steps of faith

Have you felt like a failure ?

Have you felt like no matter how hard you try

You just cant get ?

Have you felt like every thing you still

Lacks that something ?

Have you felt like you were somehow

Insignificant ?

Have you felt like you are in the crowd but

Alone ?

Have you felt like a total

idiot because you did that ?

Have you felt like you have become a

Monster ?

Do you wish you could go back to

Yesterday?

Have found yourself in a stand still ?

I DARE YOU
DARE YOU TO MOVE
TAKE STEP OF FAITH
BELIEVE IN TOMORROW
because
HIS MERCIES ARE NEW EVERY MORNING
NEW EVERY MORNING
GREAT IS HIS FAITHFULNESS !!
HE DOES FORSAKES OR LEAVES
HE WILL COMPLETE YOU
AND CHANGE YOU
BELIEVE

Walk

Being cooped in the little room in my small dormitory, being inflicted a very joy killing disease that allows me to rush to the toilet ranging from 15 to 90 intervals. Being in the agony and trapped at the same time was a sensation I would like to escape. During this two days, I could not do a single apart from sleeping and "communicate" with my computer. Well, this songs summarizes what I feel.

Do you remember when
You were way back then
You held the world inside your hands
When you told me love
Was the strongest stuff
Your strength was innocence

But, oh man
The signs of the time are omens
You're starting the day in
No man's land again

Who are you gonna be?
When you're on your knees, who do you believe?
Fear is lonely man
You've been given innocence
You've been given innocence again

You should know by now
That the darkest hour
Is when your broken heart goes down
It's a bitter end
When the sweet begins
Grace is sufficiency

But, oh dear we'll never deserve it
No dear, we never could earn it
Now, here the choice is yours

Grace is high and low
We'll never be the same

-Switchfoot-


A great song

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

We were meant to live for so much more

Fumbling his confidence
And wond�ring why the world has passed him by
Hoping that he�s meant for more than arguments
And failed attempts to fly, fly

We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside
Somewhere we live inside
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside

Dreaming about providence
And whether mice or men have second tries
Maybe we�ve been livin with our eyes half open
Maybe we�re bent and broken, broken

We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside
Somewhere we live inside
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
Somewhere we live inside

We want more than this world�s got to offer
We want more than this world�s got to offer
We want more than the wars of our fathers
And everything inside screams for second life

We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
We were meant to live for so much more
Have we lost ourselves?
We were meant to live
We were meant to live

-Switchfoot-

Run in'

Have ever wish the world was a stand still ?
That at that exact moment
The world's spot light
Will just shine of you

Have ever wish the sky would break open
a great light would lit
and you will of course
The person starring the great show

Have ever wish films would show
The life of your great journey
to the hungry eyes
of the media today

Have ever wish that the very life
you have
does not fade away
in the flow of time ?

Have ever wish the circular motion
of routines
Do not drown
the very freedom that you strive to have

Then my friends
wish no further
Find the meaning of your life
Make every second count
Even it was to "waste" it
To the very people you dread
Even it was to "lepak"
with the very people you want to run
Do it
Because it is when you stand up
we are seen

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Listen if you have ears
See if you have eyes
Understand if you pay close attention

I cannot run this rat race
where you the goal are never reachable

I cannot keep being there
when you detest me

I cannot sing
when you are close yours ears

I am tired

Sunday, March 7, 2010

My Prayer to You


My Prayer this day
is
That I can be this someone
that loves You

My Prayer this day
is
That I can be this someone
that do Your will

My Prayer this day
is
That I can be this someone
that You love

My Prayer this day
is
That I can be this someone
that worships You

God
My Prayer and one request is
not to let this heart
depart from You

Saturday, March 6, 2010

God

I am working very hard
Trying my best in effort
To calm the raging seas
To make this time comfortable

But
The choice came
between you and God
God comes first in my life
That I will not go back

I live by it

So
If you distant yourself from me
If you use me and throw me
If you hate me
If you reject and forsake me

I am willing to take that risk
with this broken heart
that My God comes first

Thursday, March 4, 2010

In Him

I believe that you in control
When I am losing my mine
I believe you love me
When I am in my sins and ill ways

I believe you the Fixer
When my heart is broken
I believe you make all things beautiful
When Your time comes

I believe you the wicked
When they transgressed against You
I believe you stood still
When you were angry with jealousy over me

Therefore,
I want to be more like you
Believing that as You did such great acts
I too can be patient and follow You
To be more of you in my life
Give me strength


I am such an idiot

What do you want with me ?
Everytime I get near someone
You will find some way
for that person to hurt me
They seem to have others better than me

Why do you let me live in agony ?
If you do not want me to get near anyone
Just isolate me and kill me
Why do you test me ?

You know I am not good with people
Yet you throw me in situations
Where I cannot run
And I do not know to respond
This
Will lead other disappointments in others

Ain't I your son ?
Why do you stop me when I try so hard
To get your people to gather
Just for a meeting ?

I am tired
but each time I run
You sentence a guilt
A string tied around my neck
Where can I run ?
Even if I run
Its death that awaits me
Where have you created me ?
Bless me and take it away
I cannot do this
I need You

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Worlds apart

The alarm hit 5.30 ! My heart and head groans to greet the painful morning. The event was really remarkable- that is the fact that I am awake such early in the morning. Though my intentions were not to pray like most of my friends today is special because I am going to school.
School is the place I grew up, a place where I thought most of the evil things of this world will come to harm. As a teacher now ( going to be), I see things from a different perspective when my footsteps hit the school compound. I no longer see a sea of friends and classmates but rather students that look alike. I no longer see teachers whom I respect but colleagues that work in the same profession. I no longer see the canteen as a place to hang out but only a place to eat. I see the classroom not like a home but job. I no longer see the system as ignorance but a pain in the neck. I see a different world