SICK

A famous saying goes " A friend in need is a friend in deed ". I never quite understood that phrase until recently. "Deed" is describe in the English dictionary as something Legal or done by somebody (participating). I think one can truly see the real friends behind fake ones when things are not going well for them. Something I would like to call system down.

To be honest, I have not been much of a friend either so criticize me as much as you need ! It all started last Thursday when I had a soar throat. I could not speak well but things were just normal around me. I was feeling kind of sleepy and I was blur. There were other problems that cause irritation to my longing to pass lecturer hours. Staggering through one lecturer hall to another was a dread though I would not have prefered otherwise. Things sort took a 180 turn when Monday came. I was now contracted with flu and a possible fever.

People start to distant me from them. I don't blame them for this !! I would have done the same thing. Apart from that, I now felt the full impact of my sickness as I was occasionally falling asleep in classes and was not paying full attention. I was blowing my nose and stopping my running nose. People started to go "eeww" or "no no no " as I sat there alone in the front row of my classroom and lecturer hall. It did not really matter because I have gotten use to the idea of not seating with someone because I am not someone who attracts attention naturally or when I talk. I need to try very hard to capture people's attention all the time. Thats besides the point. Some others have told me to see a doctor knowing full well I did not have a fever. I guess it was for fear of their safety more than even a drop of concern. Well I guess they were concern but they were concern about themselves. And you have the friends who you thought would care but never even appeared in front of people. I was feeling all kinds of emotions. Sickness was an added cause.

If the story ends her, would it not be a sad one ?? Somehow the thing that made me sway from the thought of dying from the possible contraction of h1n1 would be fine. I first met two friends who said get well soon, really would like to see get well." It was heart warming !! And then when I was eating my dinner. Two people walk towards me. One was an "angel" the other (no it was not a demon) a good brother. The angel touch my forehead to check if i had fever. Well something resounded within. The brother scolded me for not telling him. Both really made me feel I had someone there when no one cared. I am blest beyong blest to have them !! The next day a phone call from mom scolding me for not telling her about my soar throat and condition and a caring family upholding me in prayer and non-stop worrying about me.

I guess in some ways I can relate and got a little taste of what does it feel like being an HIV positive and even a H1N1 patient. Being alienated from others is bad and I have felt it many a times even when I am not sick. But I can safely say there is hope because there is a God who sends help when you cry out. I may not know how exactly are these people are feeling but somehow I would like to tell them and assure them there is a God looking over them even though the world condemns and hates them !